(plz see comment below post for a lil' design spitballing)
At this point, the idea of people controlling their data completely is not tenable-for projects that need data to proceed.
So, does that mean it is how it is and cannot be different?
It means that we devs have been lazy, moved too fast and been filled with too much hubris to build supporting options.
Instead of continuing this, let us look to tech (yes, the very thing which has destructed many of our controls over our identities... THAT ; - )) to path us differently.
Think foundationally - Before moving to collect data,build a system that allows individuals full,anonymized control over their online ids-look to systems like Bitcoin & torrents for ideas on keeping things distributed but secure-Ensure no one person or small grp of ppl can get access to any data w/o consent or strong majority consent or some such,etc.
Then, the ppl have identity control and the community has data.